I'm free

Though terribly disappointed I was refused to dive with the dolphins at the Dolphin Reef in Eilat this weekend (the only reason I travelled there) I had the most amazing experiences during my time spent in Eilat. One of the very first of those amazing experiences was when I -out of resent, out of wanting to rebel and to say "well, if I'm here I might as well take up any experience that comes my way" - went on a "shite" (miniscule 'cruise') on the Red Sea and some feeling of total freedom came down upon me while standing at the bow of the boat that carried tens of families with shouting and screaming children. I felt so lucky that I was totally free of that (but still had superdeluxe great contact with those children because they must have 'felt' my inner child) - and then.... I thought about how I was wished to be carried out of the apartment we owned -my ex and me- on a stretcher into a mental hospital, or to an ambulance straight to the grave-yard by my ex, so many, many times - and I just couldn't suppress the feeling of victory of having gained this terribly exhilarating and dream-like feeling of freedom instead of the doom he wished upon me.

If only he could see me now: